Plot summary

Coach Lambeau Fields (David Koechner) is pathetic. He has the distinction of being the worst coach in the history of sports (baseball, Nascar, football or any other) anyone can recall. A loser of enormous proportions (he is currently yanking off horse to extract their semen for breeding), the incompetent and seemingly hopeless coach is convinced by fellow coach Freddie Wiseman (Carl Weathers) to return to the field for one last shot.Assuring his long-suffering wife, Barb (Melora Hardin) & daughter Michelle Fields (Brooke Nevin) (who is a trained gymnast but currently directionless in life and having run-ins with the law), that he will not ignore his family, Coach moves them to Plainfolk, Texas where he hopes to redeem himself and his reputation.Here he begins yet another attempt to improve his abysmal record - this time as the coach of the football team at Heartland State University. But he is saddled with a team of misfits - most of whom don't know the difference between a line of scrimmage and a line at the cafeteria. Jizminder Featherfoot (Noureen DeWulf), kicker (she was a soccer player and Fields recruited her to play on the football team). Lance Truman (Matthew Lawrence), quarterback (he has the award for the most fumbles in the last season). Trotter (Jackie Long) (who is rich and carries an attitude), wide receiver. Jorge Juanson (Jesse Garcia), receiver. Buddy Boy (George Back) (who wouldn't hurt a fly), lineman. Randy Randinger (Martin Spanjers), towel boy. Aseel Tare (Robert Richard) (Fields calls his ACL Tear), running back. Retard iPod (Jermaine Williams), whom Fields appoints as his assistant.Fields starts by firing the only talented players in the startup, all African Americans. Meanwhile Lance has a crush on Michelle (who is a bad-ass on the gymnastics team, and doesn't get along with anyone there), but Michelle is already seeing Trotter. Jorge has issues with signing Fields's contract that asks the players to flunk grades, get jailed, smoke pot and basically act like ballplayers.Although the team and townsfolk are leery of the newcomer's approach, the Coach uses his unorthodox methods to whip this group of rag-tags into shape - both on and off the field. He gets them to learn balance on an ice-skating rink. He teaches them to dodge tacklers by getting them to dodge bullets. Town folks include Warden (Dennis Rodman), Cowboy (Bradley Cooper), Sheriff (Dax Shepard), Barber (Jon Gries) & Mailman (Will Arnett), who warn Fields not to blow the entire season.While the audience follows their winding road to the playoffs, the film pokes fun at the cliches and conventions of other sports flicks. In the first game against the Trojans, ACL breaks his leg tripping over a peanut thrown by Fields (after surviving a monster tackle and being hit by a bus), while Lance fumbles the ball twice. The Comebacks lose 83-0. Michelle and Lance connect as they both have the craziest sports dads ever. They try to have sex, but Lance keeps fumbling Michelle's football shaped bra.Fault lines emerge between Lance and Trotter, but Fields brings the team together with a motivational pop song, and a letter from a dying boy who wants the opposition to win. The opponents are the Titans, who have just ended racial segregation in their team and the coach picks an all-black starting line. The comebacks score 3 touchdowns to win the game by 7 points.When the players try to study that night to up their GPAs, Fields admonishes them and encourages them to have ecstasy and drink copious amounts of alcohol. Fields goes nuts and is arrested by cops and jailed. Fields calls Freddie and asks him to bail him out. Freddie refuses and reveals that Freddie wanted Fields to coach the comebacks to eliminate his competition, as Freddie coaches the Lone Star State Unbeatables.Fields eventually gets out by beating the warden at a basketball game. The team does make progress, so much so that they actually make it to the South-Southwest Conference Championship at the 2nd Annual Toilet Bowl. But Fields is angry that the team is passing their classes and locks them out of practice. Michelle asks Fields to win the Championship to prove his detractors wrong. Fields finds the entire team at a bar, doing crazy shit to impress Fields.Facing their fiercest opponents yet and yearning to win the big game, The Comebacks face off with the Lone Star State Unbeatables, coached by Freddie. Freddie brings out a team of thugs and thieves right out of prison. Just before the game, Michelle kisses Lance, antagonizing Trotter.The referees are also bribed by Freddie and don't call any fouls against the Comebacks. By half time the Comebacks are down 35-0. Fields gives the team a rousing talk using products and brand names from stuff lying around the locker room. Lance and Trotter are told by the team to put their differences aside as the team is bigger than both. Aseel comes back from injury in the 2nd half to bolster the team. even Randy gets to play and helps Aseel score.And as every great sports team has always done, The Comebacks use ingenuity and unorthodox measures (Fields figures out that Freddie knows all his plays from the X-Box and abandons them mid-game. iPod is called in to call the plays in the game) in the final showdown where the best team win. Michelle helps Lance practice with her football bra on her boobs, to given him confidence in the last time out that he won't drop the ball. Lance scores as well to tie the game. For the last play, both coaches join their respective teams.Fields decides to retire to his home life with his wife, but when he is offered a coach role at a university, he takes it in a heartbeat. The Comebacks are victorious, but Lambeau is subsequently knocked down in a surprise attack by a bus with Freddie driving it, who laughs manically as Lambeau is in pain. Lambeau groans in agony.